Posts Tagged ‘visitation’

Can my child’s mother move to another state and take my children?

Friday, August 18th, 2017

By: Kristina Beavers

There are two parts to this question.  The answer to the first part is ‘yes’, your child’s mother (or father) can move to another state.  An adult in the United States is free to move anywhere in the country.

A Relocation Case

This is called a ‘relocation’ case in the child custody world and the mother may not be allowed to take the child with her.  In Virginia, there are special criteria to allow a parent to move a child away from the other parent.  A move that would be a benefit to the mother is not always the best thing for the child and the child’s relationship to the other parent.  This is really part of the ‘best interest of the child’ standard.  The courts feel that being allowed access to both parents is usually in the best interest of the child.  But there are additional items that need to be addressed in a relocation case, such as an independent benefit to the child from allowing the move and the history and frequency of contact with the non-custodial parent.  The courts will also look at the child’s contact with local extended family and friends.

I often tell parents that a ‘normal’ custody/visitation case in the Juvenile and Domestic Relations District Court (JDR) is about the only time I might recommend handling a case without an attorney.  However, because of the details that are necessary to prove in a relocation case, I almost always recommend the assistance of an attorney.  It is just too important to leave to chance.

Contact us for more information

If you have questions about this, please contact the office of Beavers Law, P.C. at 757-234-4650 to schedule a consultation with one of our attorneys.  You can also visit us on the web at www.BeaversLaw.com.

Will I get custody if I have a bigger, nicer house?

Sunday, February 10th, 2013

That’s not exactly the question I got this week.  Instead, the actual question was about whether parents with shared physical custody needed to have comparable living arrangements.  Although I must admit that I’ve had the question that is the title of this blog post in the past.

The short answer to both of these questions is ‘NO’.

There is no requirement in VA that the children be given their own rooms, or that they be provided a home with a yard for outside play.  Also, there is no requirement in a shared custody arrangement that the homes be comparable.

Each of the homes must be ‘appropriate’ for the children.  But appropriate can encompass a lot of differences.  The main thing that is reviewed is whether the child has a safe place to sleep (so we generally look for a bed in a bedroom instead of a recliner in the living room), whether the home appears to be safe (no hanging open wires or holes in the walls), whether the home is relatively neat and clean (although ‘messy’ may be ok, dirty or filthy is usually not ok)….basically safety issues.  It is not necessary to have separate bedrooms for each of the children, although we would tend to discourage putting children of opposite sexes in the same room once one of them reaches the age of puberty.  Again, safety issues.

I know that when I grew up we had a three bedroom home with a ‘parent’ bedroom, a ‘girl’ bedroom and a ‘boy’ bedroom with the ‘baby’ staying in the parent room until he or she was able to consistently sleep through the night so as not to interrupt the other siblings.  From my experience this was the norm in my community and very few children had their own bedroom, unless they were the only child of that gender in the home.

There are also many cultural differences and what is acceptable in one culture is not necessarily acceptable in another, but that is a personal choice of the parent as long as the child is safe.

A big yard is also not required, so long as the parent has the ability to take the children to a place where they can have outside play.  To be quite honest, many families do not take advantage of their backyards for playtime and instead the children may spend more time at a park where they can play with their friends.

The relative financial position of the parents and the ability of one parent to provide a more luxurious home environment is not as important as the interaction between the parent and the child.  We’ve all seen children who have lots of toys and really enjoy playing with a box.  Also, financial disparity is addressed through child support, not custody and visitation.

What does the Commonwealth of Virginia look at when determining custody?  I’ve written a couple of blog posts here and here that go into the details of what the courts consider.  And of course you can review the actual code section here.

Bottom line?  The courts don’t really care who has the bigger home or the nicer furniture or the best car.  Assuming that the child’s safety is not an issue, what is important is the interaction of the child and the parent.

If you have any questions about this or any other legal subject, please feel free to give us a call at 757-234-4650 or visit our website at http://www.BeaversLaw.com.

What Is An ‘Uncontested Divorce’?

Wednesday, December 26th, 2012

I often have potential clients come into my office saying that they want an ‘uncontested divorce’, that quickly evolves into a ‘contested divorce’ instead.  Most of the time that is because the client really doesn’t understand what is meant by an ‘uncontested divorce’.

It is more than just an agreement that the marriage should be ended.

At least one of the Circuit Courts in this area has detailed exactly what they consider to be an ‘Uncontested Divorce’:

(a) All of the issues regarding the division of property have been agreed to by the parties; and

(b) The grounds are separation for the statutory period (no-fault); and

(c) Child support, spousal support, custody, and/or visitation are not requested; or if they are requested; there is a written and signed agreement between the spouses.

Of course, there is often no signed agreement when you first come to the attorney’s office for a consultation, but in order to have a true uncontested divorce, you need to have full agreement between the husband and wife about the important aspects of the property division and matters concerning the children.

I suggest that the husband and wife should write down what they understand to be in the agreement, so both parties have a copy of what is going to be put in the final agreement drafted by the attorney.  Once the details are given to the attorney, he or she can put those details into the proper form.

If any of the above are not true, then you probably do not have an uncontested divorce.  This does not necessarily mean that the divorce has to be contentious or that we can not quickly get to an agreement, but it will take at least a minimum of time and effort.

Usually, if the other spouse has retained an attorney for anything other than to just prepare or review some paperwork, the divorce is considered contested.

If you have any questions about this or any other legal subject, please feel free to give us a call at 757-234-4650 or visit our website at http://www.BeaversLaw.com.

Child Support and Custody (and visitation)

Saturday, September 8th, 2012

Custody and visitation go hand-in-hand because if one parent has physical custody, the time that the child spends with the other parent is called visitation.  Most people are comfortable with how these work together.

Most people are also comfortable with the idea that the parent who has physical custody of the child can receive child support from the other parent.

Sometimes the visiting parent, who is also ordered to pay child support, may not be making those child support payments on time.  That is a problem all by itself and it can be handled through the courts.

But making or not making child support payments is only one factor to be considered when determining visitation.  Not making child support payments alone should not keep a parent from having visitation with his or her child.

The bottom line is that if the court has allowed visitation with the child, the custodial parent cannot deny visitation just because the visiting parent is not current in his or her child support payments.

So, what do you do if you are reading this and you are in the position where you are behind in your child support payments and your child’s custodial parent won’t let you see your children?  The specific action will depend on what court orders are already in place concerning custody, visitation and support.

If you don’t have copies of the orders, you can go to the clerk’s office and request copies.  (this is also a good place to mention that these orders are very important and you should keep copies in a safe place so you have access to them when needed).

My suggestion is to then take those orders with you when you consult with an attorney.  That attorney will be able to read the orders, listen to your story, and give you a plan of how to go about trying to get what you want based on the laws that pertain to your situation.

From a very personal standpoint, I find it very sad when a father wants to see his children, but he doesn’t even try because he is behind in child support.  It is sad for the father, it is sad for the grandparents and other family members, but most of all, it is sad for the child.

If you have any questions about this or any other legal subject, please feel free to give us a call at 757-234-4650 or visit our website at http://www.BeaversLaw.com.

Do I need to go to court?

Monday, September 5th, 2011

I was in court last week and noticed that there were a lot of people who didn’t show up for their scheduled court dates.  The judge was NOT happy and issued a lot of ‘failure to appear’ charges.

In fact, in one case I remember, the judge dismissed the underlying reason for the person to come to court that day….but issued a summons for the person and that person now has a ‘failure to appear’ charge pending.  I know this judge usually gives people a couple of days in jail for the failure to appear, so this one particular person went from having his charge dismissed to facing possible jail time.  All because he didn’t show up.

Why do people not show up in court as scheduled?

I imagine that a lot of them just forget.  Forgetting is NOT a good excuse.  Think of it this way, would you want the jail to ‘just forget’ to let you out?  Get a calendar and mark that date.  Put a reminder on your cell phone.  Put a note on your refrigerator.  Whatever it takes to get you to court on the right day.

And make sure you know what courtroom you are assigned.  I’ve often seen situations where people will sit in court all morning just to find out they were in the wrong court!  If you don’t know for sure where you are supposed to be, ask the guard when you first come in the building.  Show the guard your summons and ask for directions to the right courtroom.   This can be especially frustrating when there are different buildings.  You can also check online to make sure you know where the court is located.  Or call the clerk’s office to confirm your date (and time) and ask the clerk for directions to make sure that you are going to the right place.

Some people say that they got a paper in court, but they never got anything in the mail.  In the past, they always got something in the mail, so they figured they would get a notice in the mail this time too.  Sorry, you get notices in the mail when they can’t give you the notice in person.  If they give you a piece of paper in court with the next court date, you NEED to be there!

I had one person tell me that the original date was ‘just for child visitation’ and they decided they didn’t want to fight the visitation request, so they didn’t show up.  Not a good idea!  If you don’t want to fight the visitation request, you need to show up in court and tell that to the judge.  Otherwise, the judge will probably issue a ‘failure to appear’ summons and you will show up in court at a later time, with a much bigger problem!

Some people say that something else came up and they couldn’t make it to court.  If something really does come up, you can contact the court before your scheduled time to appear and the judge MIGHT give you a break and schedule another day.  Being in the hospital for surgery is the type of thing that the judge might accept.  Wanting to go shopping instead, or oversleeping because you were up late the night before is something that the judge will probably NOT accept.

For traffic tickets, the officer will write on the ticket whether or not you need to appear.  Most of the time, you can use the online system to pay for simple speeding tickets (although you should be aware that pre-paying the ticket is the same as pleading ‘guilty’ and you will receive the ‘points’ against your license).  If you have been charged with reckless driving, you must appear.

Sometimes an attorney can appear in court on your behalf and you don’t need to be there yourself.  Be sure to check with your attorney to make sure whether or not you need to appear yourself.  I generally suggest that my clients also appear in court even if they don’t really need to be there.  After all, it’s your life, your money, or your freedom that is at stake and you really should be involved in anything that might happen.  The attorney can tell you what the ‘regular’ judge will probably do, but that judge may be sick this one day and there is a substitute.  It’s just better to be there yourself.

The bottom line is that if you have been told to be in court on a certain day at a certain time, you need to make arrangements to be there!

If you have any questions about this or any other legal subject, please feel free to give us a call at 757-234-4650 or visit our website at http://www.BeaversLaw.com.